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The Quaterlife-Crisis

The last few weeks or better month, when I look back, I was searching something but i was not knowing what.

I was trying to come further in my carrier starting with applying for some training on the side, getting some projects starting and also getting out in the evening and trying to meet some new people.

The results were the same. I was still having this feeling that I miss something.

So the searching was going on.

Finally, when I was sitting in work having the last 5 min of my break and again trying to find some new stuff what I could do, I found an interesting article. I was soo fascinated about it because it described directly what I was feeling all the time. These nagging feeling what I have.

And there it was. A Name. The Quarterlife-Crisis.

Yes, you can laugh about it. But it was really what I feel, I can imagine and I know also from a lot of friends that they have the same.

But for your better understanding i start first with what is the Quaterlife-Crises?

Mostly young people between 21-29years, according to my research have it. Out of my own experience I would change these numbers to 24-33years. It starts mostly after finishing with the study or after a job change. Some are just bored with their life with the same trot every day and for that we want to be as flexible in our lives as possible. You can say it is a big frustration what is starting nagging in us.

But what is it really?

  • uncertainty if it is the right job
  • uncertainty and questioning if it is really the life we want to life
  • want to make an impact in the world
  • want to be free
  • the feelings not doing enough
  • the feeling that you should be further in life
  • with these, there are coming feelings like anger and scariness
  • scared of the future
  • scared if you are in the right relationship
  • depression

We can combine all these above, where I could go on and on, to the main points:

  • frustration
  • disoriented
  • conflicts
  • uncertainty
  • overtaxing
  • loneliness
  • not enough
  • questioning everything

Why Quarterlife-crisis?

You hear normally these exactly same problems from people who are around 50-60 yeaes,  nearly leaving their job and going into pension. They try to get back the “lost time” from working one job there whole life, married and 1-2 bigger holidays per year.

For us…..

It has a lot to do with the generation Y. We have the most opportunities ever. We are trained that we can get everything. That we can be everything and then technology comes into the big game.

We see people traveling around the world, building next to it a million dollar buisness, having a girl-boyfriend and sort of archiving everything. And then the next question is arriving in our head.

What’s with us?

We are starting to compare our self to instagram profiles, and yes 99% of the pictures there are fake and only looking so freaking amazing because of filters. These people are just looking sooo damn happy and when we are in that mode it doesn’t matter, we don’t want to hear that it is all fake. For us, it is real!

Why can it be not enough to have a stable job a nice relationship and good friends?

Because we want more! We want everything! And everything right now!

First what we should realize is: You are not alone.

I have talked with a lot of friends, and they have the same feelings. I was more than surprised how much people are there. When you start one time with asking or telling them how you feel all of a sudden they are open up and telling their story.

For me it is really simple I have just figured out in my travel what i don’t want any more but I still don’t know what I want. Here my life-motto takes part again. Trust life. I have realized that some stuff I try really hard on is not working, also when I take my full effort in it. Others i just maybe write an E-Mail and wola it’s there. I know now that i  need to trust life and it will support me. (Yes i also sometimes /quite often questioning it!)

Sometimes everything must fall apart to create something new.

But how can we get over the Quarterlife-Crises?

  1. Define a goal. Here the stupid question what everyone hates comes. Where do you see yourself in 3 -5 years? Private life, job, income, family and friends. What kind of dreams do you want to archive….. Write down how your life is in 3-5 years. Don’t miss any aspect of life.
  2. Make a plan. Now make a plan what you want to archive in 1 year or better in 3 month (or both). Then all your goals don’t look that big anymore. You want to get fitter? Then start tomorrow with a run for example. In 3 month you will see already a different. And again do this in every aspect in your life.
  3. See the positive things in life. Look at your current situation. Be greatful of whatever you have. Is the fridge full? Is the rent paid? Is the family healthy?…. There is soo much stuff to be greatful for. Take every evening just 5-10 min before you go to bed and go through your day. BE GRATEFUL OF EVERY SMALL THING IN YOUR LIFE.

 

I hope I could help some of you with this article and I would love to hear what you think over it. We need to talk over this topic way more and get aware of it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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